i love your mum but she love your dad

oh god,
someone,
just one will be enough.
i've been posting about this,
again and again and again and again and again and again and again.
i just cant,
just can't,
just can't,
just can't,
just can't,
stop thinking about her.
her face,
kept rewinding in my head.
how can i say i will forget her,
when now i'm still thinking of her?
fuck my ass man!
goddddddd

first in my entire life

first of all,
thanks guys for the celebration.
seriously,
it's my first birthday celebration with friends.
i'm sooooo touched.
thanks god.
i able to find this bunch of monkeys with good heart.
:)
but the thing is,
i forget to take the present home.
i'm sorry guys
i really forget.
but the thing is,
i really had fun with you guys just now.
THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS THANKS

and i'm going to end with this pathetic sentence(s),
"i really can't forget you.
like seriously,serious.
i miss you.
everyday,
i always waiting for your msg.
i expect you to text me.
but you didn't."
how sad can my life be.

what a fucking day

donate $2.
lost $50.
seriously what the fuck lah!

it's really painful

i suppose to smile,
instead i frown.
tears roll my face.
this few days,
i've been thinking of you.
your face kept replaying on my mind.
i don't know why i would think of you,
when i'm not suppose to.
oh god,
what's wrong with me?
why i think of her when she don't even think of me?
everybody told me to forget about her,
but don't have the guts to.
and now,
i'm the one who's hurt.
my oh my

for sure

it's fine if people talk bad about me.
but if you people talk bad about my parent's,
i'll make sure your parent's won't recognise you.

change of lyrics

i got my hands in my pocket and
my head in a cloud.
this is how i do,
when i think of you.
i never thought you could break me apart,
but eventually,
you did.
i keep a sinister smile
and get hot of my heart.

i take a deep breath when i used to look at your innocent eyes.
the feeling,
is so surreal.
as time goes by,
i feel a weakness coming on.
it never felt so good to be so wrong.
had my heart lockdown,
you turned me around and i feel like a newborn child.

your scent is like a drug to me.
you like my personal brand of heroine.
and,
i don't have the strength,
the energy,
to stay away from you.
everytime you have problems,
i'll be there when i can.
your tears is the rain,
upon my earth.

10cm thick i guess uh

i've looked for love in stranger place,
but never found someone like you.
someone whose smile makes me feel i've been holding back
and,
there's nothing i can do.

most of our friend,
saw from the start,
what had happen during our high moments.
so why didn't we believe it too?
now look,
where we are now?
we're in different path ways.
and,
you're in my heart till now.
there's no escaping it for you.

you are the sun in my world.
you wake me up with a smile on my face,
with the no link message,
which really makes my day.
and considered the best when i've felt the worst of all time.

cause this is real,
and this is good.
it's no fairytale.
it warm the inside of me
and it's just like it should,
but it didn't turn out from what i expect it from.
i miss you p.

i think i'm pregnant

it's only 5th week,
and we're are close already.
try to hold this friendship as tightly as possible.
don't snap it.
and i'm proud,
to have friends like them
and not to forget,
my secondary school friends.
when shall me we meet man?
what happen to GC?!
hah

theflanguage

whoafuck!
mostofmyfriends
inrelationship.
andhereiam,
stillalone.
withoutbeinginrelationship.
fuck.
whatthefuckiswrongwithme?
whattheyhave,
butidon'thave?
whatisit?
cananyone,
pleasefuckingtellme?
yesiagree,
postingthismakesmesounddesperate
but,
i'mjustclarifyingthings.
whatthefuckiswrongwithme?
what?
what?
i'mangryonmyself
i'mpissedonmyself
i'mdisappointedonmyself
godplease
showmethelight
don'tmakemelostinthispath
wherei'mwalkingat.
iknowthat,
godlistentomyprayer,
and
i'mverysreofmyselfthatmyprayerwillbeanswered.
andthat'sforsure.
amen.

mighty jo young son's

you always love me,
for who i am.

you always support me,
when i need encouragement.

you always cheer me up,
when i'm feeling down.

you always be there for me,
when i'm down.

without you,
i will never be what i am now.
your love to me,
never ends.
it seems that,
i'm the one who didn't show the love to you.
i am bad,
really bad.
i shouldn't be rude with you.
you are who you are.
you have the rights to shout at me.
you have the rights to point out my mistakes.
but the ego
that lies within me
make me loose my temper
and raise my voice even louder than yours.
when i want something,
i always ask from you.
but when you give me the answer,
"i don't have the money now"
i will show my tantrum
and leave you alone.
eventually,
you do get for me that something.
you don't want to disappoint me.
you sacrifice your own savings,
to get what i want.
i'm so selfish.
i've never think about you.

i realised,
that being in your shoe is really hard.
you always understand my feelings,
but i don't.
i will never be able to repay your kind deeds to me.
not even money will be able to repay.
i know you won't read this.
whatever it is,
i'm sorry.
i feel real bad
when i think of it.
sorry.
sorry.
sorry.
sorry.
sorry.
all i want to say is that,
i love you mum.
i always love you.

in the end

blog,
is the only place i talk about love,
emotions.
-.-

where do love come from?
i've asked some,
and the answer heart.
but to me,
it's not the heart.
but the feeling.
this feeling make us to love
and
not to love.

and pei hui,
if you reading this,
sorry if i can't make it to your birthday party.
i can't promise you,
you see.
thus,
please don't be sad k?
:)

nutella ella ella eh eh

i ain't fussy driver.
find parking lot,
must near to the exit,
yet,
still have to walk.
no cars park beside them.
yet,
cars still park beside their's.
park at expensive parking lots,
yet,
if robbers wanna rob,
they still rob.

it doesn't have to be near to exit.
it doesn't have to be no cars beside them
it doesn't have to be expensive parking lots.
all parking lots the same.
it's the matter of,
want or don't want.

thus,
if finding for love
accept for who she is.
but not what she is.

serve me right

i asked her to stay
but she wouldn't listen.
the words that mend the things that were broke.
but now,
it's far too late,
as she's gone away.

every night i cry myself to sleep.
thinking,
"who does this happen to me?
why does every moment have to be so hard?

the taste of your kiss,
i can't get over.
the laugh that you made,
kept me awake.

of all the things i felt,
but never really shown.
perhaps,
the worst is that you ever let me go.
and i shouldn't have let it happen.

you drain me dry,
and make me wonder why i'm even here.
i want you to stay,
but i know that you want me to gone.

what you're doing,
is screwing things up inside my head.
i should know better,
that you never listened to the words i said.
but i don't mind.
it's better to let it out.

does it kill?
does it burn?
is it painful to learn?
that's me that has all the control.

does it thrill?
does it sting?
when i feel what you doing?
i wish that i had you to hold.

when it's get cold outside,
and there i am,
got nobody to love.
i doubt,
you'll understand what i mean when i say,
"there's no way i gonna give up"

it's not over yet.
as i still have hopes in it.
just give me one more chance to make it right.

fuck their dirty brains lah

what's wrong with people nowadays?
just now,
working,
while waiting for show to end
and assigned the patron to exit from the front door,
i saw this couple,
pleasuring themselves.
the girl pleasure her bf
by jerking his dick.
wtf?
how i know?
both of them cover themselves with scarf,
and i can see the movement of
"up and down"
on the scarf.
**try to imgaine lah**
and that's was real pathetic lah.
worst of all,
it's the show wolverine.
how dumb can they be?
lucky there's no kids besides them.
what if there's kids?
brainless act by this stupid couples.
go fuck their brains lah.
get a life.
get a proper room.
no money?
staircase will do.
but not in the theater.
gosh!

and i hate seeing couples.
seeing them,
make myself so useless.
seeing them,
make me have this thought,
"why they in relationship and i'm not?
am i bad?
am i not good looking?"
this things make me scratch my head.
seeing them,
make me fail as a duty of a guy.
and the thoughts that i thought,
is true,
indeed.
fuck me
someone,
shoot me in the head.
someone,
cut my dick off.
fuck!

i've waited long enough.
and the patience within me have reached to it's limit.
now i really have to go.
go away from the spot.
go away from the world of fantasy.
have to face the reality.
no more wondering,
no more hoping.
but just go.

but,
but,but,
i still don't have the power,
don't have the courage,
don't have the intention,
just to go like that.

i sound really really pathetic.
am i?
yes i am.

like nbcb

for past few days,
i've been dreaming about myself,
get killed.
why i'm having this dream?
what's the meaning of this?
is god trying to tell me something?
if so,
why about myself get killed?
it's not just ordinary way of die.
it's just gruesome way for me to die.
like,
hit by car,
being stabbed.
and that's real scary.

if i pursue the facts,
connect eh dots,
eventually i'll come to the truth.

fishcake head

the world's got a funny way of turning round on you
but here i am covering you up with all my efforts.

when a friend of yours try to stab right in your face
but here i am giving you courage to overcome it.

losing faith in everything you thought that you hoped you knew
but here i am gain those faith back.

all along you know you thought you got the best of me
but here i am giving you my best which i can.

you were wrong and they're laughing right in your face
but here i am doing my best to make you smile.

and here i am,
don't sweat it.
as it's just a false pretense.

and that gay girl,
if you reading this,
stay being a gay
and keep irritate people.
haha.

run out words,
i'm done.
fullstop

ship ship ship your mother relationship lah

some,like me,
finding someone to be in relationship with.
and some,
in relationship thinks it's driving them goooo crazy.

but in my point of view,
having relationship it's the best thing could happen to anyone.
we can love,
and be loved,
by someone whom we really love
or care for.
and why those in relationship be in relationship,
when they are the one who accepts to be in relationship?
why they always keep saying that,
"i think he/she is not the one for me."
and some,
"he/she giving me all sorts of problem."
and some,
even worse,
"i think he/she don't love me anymore."
when they say that,
it shows that they don't think.
relationship,
for sure they will go through like
problems,
misunderstandings.
it's part of relationship.
without it,
all they have is love.
and it's going to be like =.=" .
isn't it nice,
when we're in relationship,
we know there's someone out there
think of us?
care us?
love us?

i've mentioned,
listen,
understand,
give and take,
trust,
is the sure secure thing for love.

i talked as if i'm in relationship.
but i don't.
with the experience that i've been through in 4 years with her,
with the problems that people shared with me,
i know what i need in relationship.
but it's merely perfect though.

and please shafiq,
go on!
gosh!

the beautiful one

during holiday,
i can't wait for school.
now school has started,
lots and lots and LOTS of assignment need to be done.
these thing driving me go crazy.
and i,
as the group leader,
have to take the responsibility.
fuck!

oh yes,
i won't hesitate
and accept her like how we used to be
if there's a chance.
you asking for an obvious answer.
you know how much i love her,
don't you?
but too bad,
my effort,
all gone to waste.

it's been quite sometime since i've last chatted with you uh.
in some ways,
you still inspiring me.
especially your kindness and patient-ness.
it's way way the best for me.
none whom i contacted with,
have this kindness and patient-ness in them.
i'm not trying to say that
i don't regret contact with them.
i'm not trying to say
that their not kind.
but i still find it,
your's still the best.
what can i say,
you're mine-ed uh?
haha
gees,
talking about you,
reminds me of our past.

remember,
infront wisma,
when i spilled ice-cream on you?
hah
remember,
the boxer short that i gave you for valentine's day?
hah
remember,
i gave you flowers which i picked up along the streets?
hah
those time,
you really filled my days with happiness
and not to forget,
your irritating-ness.
:)
i can't deny,
you the best i ever had.
and yes,
i found one who as good as you,
but,
she left,
she went missing,
just like that.
with no specific reasons.

and you
or the others
may wonder,
why would i be making a big fuss about this?
it's because,
i'm proud of having you.
hah











and thanks,
for sending me both of you and JT pictures.
i'm sure JT will be cuter
if i were to be his dad huh.
haha
whatever it is,
i miss you
and
thanks for consoling me hans.
you make me see
who the fuck is shafiq.

issues after issues

why?
why?
why?
why when i want to get to know this particular girl,
they always dating
or attached
or just broke.
why?
am i jinxed?
what the fuck is wrong with me?
i don't use any black magic to my myself
nor i used any money to know the girl.
i just don't understand why.
i'm not the only one who has been through this.
but most of my friends,
it's just a snap of their finger
but me?
gosh.
i'm totally one useless guy.
TOTALLY USELESS.
and i just have to accept the fact,
that i am one
=,)

death awaits me

i can no longer take it anymore.
my songs,
make my bloody body move,shake ,drop.
like fishcake stick man!
haven't 18,
i'm like this.
and when i'm 18?
die man.
i try to control myself,
but i can't.
what should i do?
meditate?
suicide?
dig nose?
walao!
fuck lah!

never think about me sia

7th june,
vaunt 4 at st james!
which is on sunday.
walao!
the organizer,
can go dig nose lah!
and shoot the boogers
like shooting carom piece lah.
why in the world would they make it on sunday,
when poly students still schooling.
fuck their brains lah!
go dig their nose lah!
go lick their own nose lah!
go pull out their leg hair lah!
geeeeeeeeeeeeeesusssssssss crrrriiissssssssssssssss!
this kind of people
don't deserve to be exist in this world lah.

it's like no link at all

how does it feel when you being used?
how does it feel when you get cheated?
you won't know,
till you went through it.
i've went mine,
and the feeling
sooooo suck to the sucky!
i'm sure,
no one would feel happy when the been through it.
if they are,
they are served to get cheated and being used.

i doubt she's using me.
i doubt she's cheating me.
and i just doubt.
i just doubt about it.
like seriously doubt about doubting it.

and just now,
in train,
i overheard a lady talking on the phone saying,
"we live in the world of unfairness.
he's like doing his own stuff
and forget about me."
but i don't think we living in the world of unfairness.
the world is fair.
it's complete with everything we need,
and it's up to us,
to make things fair.
and this fairness,
make things way way better.

imagine,
a soccer match without referee.
without referee,
instead running for the ball,
they'll be fighting one another.

nothing else than the brain

many people are completely unaware of the fact,
that their behaviour,
at times,
determined by their uncontrollable
feelings and emotions
rather than their thoughts.

this will lead to quarrel.
and those in relationship,
the worst thing that can ever happen
would be end of the relationship.
it shows how brainless the guy/girl's are.
they can actually solve by just talking
and
control their emotions.
but instead,
the blame one another
and starts to quarrel.
all vulgarities never been heard of,
came out in an instant.
and that's when,
the guy/girl will give up,
and end the relationship.

how stupid can they be?
before in relationship,
their understanding is soooo over.
it's like they actually understand the whole person.
they can be give and take,
and patient.

during relationship?
these things,
all gone!
they never think
that those understandings,
give and take,
patient,
they had before
is the key for their relationship.
thus,
they end it by breaking up.

and after relationship?
they regret.
even some,
sooo hurt for their stupid decision,
one way,
suicide,
slicing their hand like slicing mango.
these reckless behaviour that they made,
make their love ones,
which is their family,
suffer.
they don't even think that they have family.
who they can depend on.

my theory,
"if you're stupid,be like one.
don't act clever and make others suffer."

in the box again

girl nowadays,
wear clothes,
can make those old uncle's saliva dripping from their mouth man.
geeees.
soooo eye-popping.

and little girl,
i seriously still have feelings for you.
friends have been telling me to move on.
but it's so hard.
i'm like going crazy just because of this.
gosh!
gosh!
gosh!

shafiq!
please!
carry your heavy-duty butt and go!
don't wonder around but go.

i miss you little girl.
you'll always remind me to text you when you're going offline.
and that point of time,
i know there's someone thinking of me.
waiting for my text-es.
but now,
nil.
no one.
i lost someone whom i care most.
be gone,
spoof!,
without any reasons.
and i'm glad to say this,
i don't regret to have you in my mind.
you warm my heart.
you fill my mind with smiles,
with care,
with love.
thank you little girl.
much appreciated.
no regrets.

purpose of the brains is for display.

and she go oh my god.
and she go oh my god.
she really caught my eyes.
yet,
i'm still scared to do anything.
low self-esteem.
low self-courage.
anyone can sell me their esteem and courage to me?

and i have some issues,
about people who take advantages of my kindness.
toooooo bad,
complain.
say i'm heartless.
don't know how to care.
don't know how to love.
don't know how to comfort.
but,
when i'm nice,
there you guys are,
misuse it.
just take it what's in-front of your eyes
and forget about the back.

when you guys have problems,
who's both left & right ear you get from?
when you guys sick,
who's mouth you get from who force you go doctor and take medicine?
when you guys feel down and torn apart,
who's heart you get from to filled up that empty space within you?

when you guys get angry,
your ego-ness,
make you lose control
and that's when i'm the one who gonna get blamed.
don't you guys think about people's heart?

i am no close to perfect to say this.
neither you guys are.
but i'm trying my best,
to look good in your guys eyes.
yet,
i failed as a duty being a guy.
i disgrace the male species.
at times,
i do make mistakes
if so,
i'm sorry.

anyone who read this,
i hope you understand how i feel.
i don't want people out to go through
what i've been through.
seriously,
the feeling is like,
you trying to suck your own dick.

fuck and dump

why people say
i'm the type of guy who have lots of crush-es,
when the fact is that,
i only stick to one?
what's with people nowadays
they been looking down on me.
like totally down.
not just that,
some even worst.
they say,
i look like sex maniac.
it's like,
wtf lah?
what did i do wrong?
what's wrong with me?
i'm like trying to lead my own life,
then these people,
giving me comments which is not suppose to be known by me.
why?
why?
did i spam you people?
why?
why?
god damnit!
lead your own life will you?
geeeeessss!
for once,
please,
lead your own life.
for goodness sake!

and yes,
it's still linger me.
i know,
it's pathetic.
think whatever you want to think.
can't run away from the fact.
i hate this.
like seriously-damn-seriously-serious.
god,
please.
someone,
please.
help me.
i no longer can take this.

=,)

Do you believe this?

A girl went to her friends house and
she ended up staying longer than
planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't
afraid because it was a small COMMUNITY and she lived only a few blocks away.


As she walked along under the bike trail Amina asked ALLAH to keep her safe from harm and danger.

When she reached the alley, which was a short
cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her.

She became uneasy and began to recite a dua, asking
for ALLAH’S protection.

Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness
and security wrapped round her, she felt as
though someone was walking with her.

When she reached the end of the alley, she
walked right past the man and arrived home
safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper
that a young girl had been killed in the same
alley just twenty minutes after she had been there.

Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the
fact that it could have been her, she began to
weep.

Thanking ALLAH for her safety and to help
this young woman, she decided to go to the
police station.

She felt she could recognize the man, so she
told them her story.

The police asked her if she would be willing to
look at a lineup to see if she could identify him.

She agreed and immediately pointed out the
man she had seen in the alley the night before.

When the man was told he had been identified,
he immediately broke down and confessed.

The officer thanked AMINA for her bravery and
asked if there was anything they could do for her.

She asked if they would ask the man one
question. Amina was curious as to why he had not
attacked her.

When the policeman asked him, he answered, 'Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her.'

Amazingly, whether you believe or not,
you're not alone. ( people ) will not stand up for ALLAH.......

Send this and make the subject the name of (your city) if you truly believe in

ALLAH.....

PS: ALLAH is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what

'If you deny me in front of your friends, I shall deny you on the day of Judgement

STAND UP FOR HIM